Play it Danny Boy!

Danny playing the piano last night . . . it was very cute, and he was very into it!

 

Blankies and Bears

My boys love their blankets and teddy bears.  

One night Austin realized that he had left his blanket where his dad was staying and he was so heartbroken!  So I pulled my old blanket out of my cedar chest and let him use it for the night.  He felt bad taking it from me, and wanted me to sleep with it.  I explained to him that it would make my blanket so happy to be his blanket for a night, that it would be an adventure for my blanket.  He still wasn't a 100% happy to not have his blanket but at least it got him through the night!

And here is just a cute shot of Danny cuddling with his bear!

Shopping Spree - Thrift Store Style!

My counseling appointments, through LDS family services (wonderful, beautiful people!  I so love my new counselor!) are down at the DI building way down in Sac.  And since I was there today I decided to take a look around and see if I could find any pants to fit me.  Well, I was able to get 4 pants, 1 skirt, and 5 tops all for $33!  And they were all good name brands too, Bongo, Gap, Old Navy, Levi's, Aeropostale, Jones New York, Charlotte Russe.  Most exciting was being able to fit into a pair of jeans that I would have never even looked twice at before.  Admittedly a lot of the weight has come off due to the stress (I had lost 2 sizes prior to all this, and two more since he actually left), but I will take whatever silver lining I can get!

Something Crafty!

It has been a long, long while since I have done something crafty, let alone blogged about it.  But this week I actually made a card (for my friend Tami), and then today I made a phone pouch from felt for my new phone.  I did not buy anything protective for it when I got it, and have realized that if I just throw it in my purse, like I am prone to do, then the screen will get all scratched up.  So I raided my mom's felt box, picked out some colors that went nicely together and voila . . . 

 . . . I love it!  It feels good to be crafty again  :)

Lovely Ladies

A girls night out at Ruby Tuesday's for my friend Tami's 50th birthday, surrounded by a group of truly lovely ladies . . . Alyssa, a friend, Tara, Tami, Wendy, Me, Lynn, Patsy, Alicia, Carrie, Alyssa's mother in law, and Carol.  It was so fun to spend and evening with them and get to catch up, several of them I have not had the chance to see since I moved from Placerville 3 years ago!  So thank you to Tami for having a birthday, and Alicia and Tara for planning it so we had the excuse to get together!

(and thank you to Carrie too, because I pirated the picture from your blog!)

Mercy River

I recently attended Time Out for Women, and performing there was the group Mercy River.  I fell in love with their music and harmonies, not to mention that so many of their songs spoke right to my heart.  The following song is the one that I am currently listening to . . . a lot . . .

Click on the pic to visit their web site and listen to a bit of their music

Beautiful Dawn


From the album Beautiful Dawn

Take me to the breaking of a beautiful dawn
Take me to the place where we come from
Take me to the end so I can see the start
There’s only one way to mend a broken heart

Take me to the place where I don’t feel so small
Take me where I don’t need to stand so tall
Take me to the edge so I can fall apart
There’s only one way to mend a broken heart

Take me where love isn’t up for sale
Take me where our hearts are not so frail
Take me where the fire still owns its spark
There’s only one way to mend a broken heart

Teach me how to see when I close my eyes
Teach me to forgive and to apologize
Show me how to love in the darkest dark
There’s only one way to mend a broken heart

Take me where the angels are close at hand
Take me where the ocean meets the sky and the land
Show me to the wisdom of the evening star
There’s only one way to mend a broken heart

Take me to the place where I feel no shame
Take me where the courage doesn’t need a name
Learning how to cry is the hardest part
There’s only one way to mend a broken heart

Be the Change . . .

I have taken off my wedding ring.  I couldn't stand the constant reminder of how wrong my world has gone.  But my left hand was so bare, and that was hurting too.  Today I saw a ring, and in it is etched the words "Be the change you wish to see in the world".  That is a quote I have always liked and now it has even more meaning to me.  My life is changing.  I may not like what has happened, but I can be the change that I want to have in my life.  This ring now adorns my left hand to remind me that I can bring about positive changes in my life regardless of the circumstance I find myself in.

Changes

So I have made the blog private.  I hope it works!

An Admission

Bryce finally admitted to me today that he is in love with this other girl and has asked me for a divorce.  I tried to get through to him one last time, but nothing I say or do reaches him any more.  I tried to prepare my heart for this but it didn't help.  The amount of hurt, betrayal, rejection, sadness, and even anger, is staggering.  Once again, I cannot tell you all how much your love, support and prayers mean to me right now.  Every time I think of the words of support, the acts of service and love I have received, it gives me a little more courage to just keep moving forward.  I know I have the strength in me to handle this, I have to, for my boys, so that I can be the kind of mother who will help them weather this storm in their life and emerge as strong and emotionally healthy individuals.  They have such beautiful spirits, and are such a blessing in my life, and it kills me that I cannot protect them from the hurt this will cause them.  All I can do is love them, and have a constant prayer in my heart for the Lord to show me the best way to help them heal.

I have decided that I will be staying here at my parents for now.  Austin will get to go to the school I attended as a child.  If you need to reach me, my cell phone does not work here, so contact me by email or my parents home number.

Also, I will probably be making my blog private within the next week or so.  For those of you who are followers I will automatically send you an invite.  But if you are not a follower but still want to keep updated with us, then send me an email, or leave a comment on here so I can send you an invite to.

And once again, my love to all of you.

Words I thought I'd Never Say . . .

My dearest family and friends,
I have news to share, that I don't want to share, that I thought I would never say.  Three weeks ago Bryce left the boys and I.  We had been having a very rough time over the past months, the issues are very personal, and hurtful and I am not going to go in to details, but I thought that we were working through it.  I truly believed that we loved one another and we could make it through anything.  I have put my heart and soul in to trying to save what I thought we had but he has made decisions that show that he has no interest in trying.  He has decided to move on, and find "happiness" elsewhere, before he has even made motions towards divorce.  I am still in shock.  Until faced with the cold hard evidence I refused to give up hope in him, in us.  The level of hurt, sadness and betrayal I feel is unexplainable.  The kinds words, love and support that I have been receiving from all of you helps me so much more than I can say.  And my boys, my sweet baby boys, their love and light and laughter are my saving grace right now.  They have been the answer to so many of my prayers.  Please continue to pray for us, and even for Bryce as well.
All my love,
Sarah